Baby Steps...Baby Steps

Okay, here’s the skinny on tonight’s happenings. I went to institute; the social mecca of single LDS young adults like myself. While I would normally go to the same class as last week because I felt obligated after signing the roll, I broke my good girl habits, stepped out of my box and went to a different class. Honestly, the one last time just didn’t cut it for me. The hottie I talked to last week was in the new class and I had heard some great things about the teacher. We will get to that shortly however. First, let’s talk about my observations. I was a little late to class because I really had to finish watching last night’s recorded episode of The Bachelor before leaving my house. Thank goodness Michelle left huh! Anyway, I walked in late but, by some miracle, was still able to snatch the last available seat in the back of the room. It really is a great place to scope out the prey. Anyway, as I was doing said scoping, I noticed that several of the guys looked a little bit familiar and a well known feeling of paranoia settled over me. Why so paranoid? Ever since I started this silly online escapade, I am worried that I will run into one of these guys in person and they will recognize me. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing to be ashamed about from my communications with them, other than the fact that I was bold enough to write them but was never good enough for them to respond to. Anyway, I don’t think that any of the guys there were actually people that I have approached in the online world, I just get thinking about it and worry. This particular guy was eyeing me which is what brought it all on. I thought that maybe he recognized me or something. Anyway, I moved on, took a deep breath, sat back and tried to enjoy the rest of the class, leaving the rest of the scoping for later.

Okay, topic number two of tonight’s events: the teacher. I just want to briefly mention her because I can see her quickly becoming a new hero of mine. My previous recommendations for her class were based solely on her knowledge and skills as a teacher. I was certainly not disappointed in this regard. She was amazing! One thing I enjoyed was that she wasn’t afraid to disagree with comments given and she wasn’t afraid to absolutely agree with the ones that she agreed with. She was on her toes the entire class. That isn’t completely what I liked about her though. I gathered from some of her comments that she is about 41-42 years old. She looks a little younger but from some things she said, this is what I am estimating. At one point in the class she mentioned that she has been single for a loooong time. We were talking about keeping a strong moral compass. This woman is my new hero in sticking to her morals and in just living her life despite her marital status. There are so many of us out there in this situation and I think that in some ways, we are here to help each other to deal with it and to realize that life does go on and that we can be strong in who we are and in what believe no matter what. Strong woman….that’s for sure!

Now, for the topic you have all been waiting for: the man I talked to. Now, this is where the headline for this post comes in to play, just keep that in mind okay. So, I was sitting there enjoying the class and the one guy that I was sure was on my internet dating site kept looking my way. I thought that maybe he would be the one. Then, half way through the class, a real good looker walked in and sat by me. I was sitting next to a table on the back wall and he just sat down right on the table. It seemed convenient enough to make him the one, even though by the looks of him, we were in two very separate classes of humanity. He was hot though…just maybe more so than what I normally feel comfortable conversing with. I thought it out throughout the rest of the class and by the time we were leaving, I made my approach. Well, we were still sitting there. I turned to him and said, “she said we could keep these right?” He said, “yeah.” Hmmm, yep…that was our whole conversation, if you want to call it that! Hey, at least I made an approach of sorts people. He was clearly giving the signals that he was not interested in pursuing the conversation any further so I took my fine self out to the linger longer.

The linger longer….it has made some steps of its own this week. That’s right; they replaced the trail mix with some delightful doughnuts! While I was feeling slightly off my game after that ridiculous attempt at a conversation with the in class hottie, I was determined to find more success in this arena. I slowly moved around the middle of the crowd, looking for just the right guy or guys to approach. Suddenly, I was approached by…a girl??? Apparently I was giving off the vibe alright, not sure that it was the right vibe for this situation though. Yikes! The conversation with this girl did serve a purpose however and that purpose will be shared right now. I’m not sure how old she was but having just met her, I found her conversation to be one shocking revelation after another. For the girl’s sake, I was really grateful that I wasn’t a man. I know I shouldn’t compare but talking to her made me realize that I may not have any game but it is certainly miles ahead of some girls…this one in particular. She is going into education but she revealed to me that she just really wants to have kids…she thinks she is ready and just in that place in her life. Ummm, I don’t think so. She went on and on about how if she makes it to 30 without being single she will just shoot herself or something of that nature. She would just have a break down and she said to me, “what girl wouldn’t ya know?” I told her that life goes on and it’s okay. I really wanted to tell her that there was this awesome blog I know about by a girl who is 30 and single and just living the life. More so however, I wanted to write about her on said blog so I didn’t share. So selfish of me, I know but really? I sincerely hope that her approach to men is not what it was to me. After awhile I shut her out and started writing this very post in my head as she spoke to me. Then I quickly came up with a plan to rid myself of her, which I did. How was I supposed to talk to a guy after this? I had to hide from her but I noticed that she was talking to other girls that she had approached. Honey, if you want a baby so bad, maybe you should be talking to the gender that can help you make one, I’m just sayin…

Okay, what a night! Progress is progress, despite how large or small it may be so just remember that and be proud that I even tried to speak to a guy. Also, if you are single, please don’t act like the girl who approached me tonight…she is not doing herself, or me for that matter, any favors. Anyway, I talked to a boy, enjoyed class and learned a lesson about myself and about how I should never, never act. Therefore, we can chalk this night up as a success!