People often refer to older single's as 'leftovers.' Well, I am no leftover, nor do I deserve to settle for someone that is.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Wandering Aimlessly

I’ve had a desire to find a man for as long as I can remember. Of course I had other goals too; we’ve talked about this. The thing is, I have been wandering around looking for him without direction. Today I feel slightly more directed for a number of reasons. The main reason is that I have been reading the blog that Utah’s Dating Coach does. I told you about her before…Alisa Goodwin Snell. Recently I attended a fireside where she spoke and then I bought her book a few weeks later. I still haven’t read the book because I have been processing all of the other information that I have read from fellow experts on the subject. That brings me to the other reason I feel more direction in this process. All of this study of what the experts say is starting to stick in my every day thoughts.

Anyway, the point is that I have a more personal connection now. This lady, for starters ,is a woman. So am I. Today was the first time that I realized that she was the only woman expert I have read. Of course I have loved the books and advice from the men too because it’s nice to know what men are thinking and who knows better than men themselves?? Alisa though, she can relate to me because I am a woman. She is also of the same faith and resides here within the same culture that I do, giving her and I more in common. So, as I read her advice that is freely given in the blog, I feel like it is more catered to me specifically.

Some of the things that she advises (which are also in her book) include making goals, having faith, and making a top ten list of the qualities you are looking for in a man. In this week’s blog she also talks about identifying our fears, and will later address how to use faith to overcome them. There are three lovely single ladies, like myself, participating in the blog, and they share their stories and what they are working on. Along the way, Alisa gives advice. I love it because I too can work on what they are working on. I fully plan on participating as much as I can. In this way, it’s like I am getting my own personal dating coach…except that she doesn’t really know me. That’s okay though. I can try her techniques and see where it gets me. I am also hoping to attend one of her workshops with some friends this summer so anyone that’s interested, leave me a comment!

Well, I think that I’ve been quite the slacker lately at goal making. I’m glad for some direction here. One girl on the blog had some fabulous goals, which I want to try and do myself this week. They involve praying to be more aware of single men, where they are, when I am near them and being more approachable to them. Confession: today at the gym…I realized that I may scowl at men there. I don’t know why, I think I’m just self-conscious. Just because I just got out of bed, put on my workout clothes, and drove to the gym, doesn’t mean I can’t practice smiling at men though. It’s not like they were looking at me in an unfriendly way, they were just looking in my direction. So, even when I’m at the gym, I’m gonna put on my happy face and show those men my pearly yellows! Someday maybe I’ll whiten them.

Okay, goal number two (there are three…in case you’re wondering how long we will be here). The second goal, I believe, was to research or participate in ways to find or finding activities at least 5 days a week. Today I joined a hiking group. Yay. It looks like they do hikes frequently so we’ll see how that goes. I probably won’t be able to go for a little while though, because right now my schedule is crazy!! I’ll see if I can fit it in soon. Meanwhile, I am totally considering trying out an older single’s ward on Sunday, and I have some fun events planned for the weekend. No worries, I will definitely be blogging about them. It should be a fun-filled, finding-filled weekend. I can feel #’s 8,9, and 10 just around the corner!

Finally, Alisa advised that I make a top ten list. I have thought about this all day. This is what gives me direction. You have to know what you are looking for right? I mean, I’ve had a general idea, but putting it down on paper really solidifies it. Also, it is easier to tell people what you are looking for when you have a list. They can judge me for being picky all they want but if his qualities are not on my list, then he’s out. This is especially true of the top five which are supposed to be non-negotiable.

So, there you have it. I am walking down an actual road now. It’s the road the men live on I’m sure! As for you, raise your hand if you are reading my blog and not following it? All you gotta do is click the button to the right and you get to be my follower too. You should also tell your friends about me because it seems like the right thing to do! Look at that, I have already given you two goals for the week. Hmmm, a third? Well, find me a man with my top ten and I’ll love you forever! I will post them as soon as I finish and solidify the list.

Ps…Do you like the new song? So cute huh! Don’t worry, Michael will be back. We are just taking a break for a minute while I try to become more blog savvy….yikes!


Christine said...

Love that new update on the blog! I need to take on the goals you have made. This will be a summer of practice!!!

Livin it up said...

Yes, yes it will! I need lots of it. I'm so glad for Summer and more time to work on me!!

Cindy Lou said...

I seriously may cry like a baby if you leave me at the branch alone!! I don't think I can handle it. But I agree with Christine, I think I need to take on the goals you have set. I am all about fining things to do this summer to meet new people and just put myself out there. For once in my life I just need to be brave.

And I just have to say that you are an amazing woman!

Livin it up said...

Thanks Cindy!! Let's come up with some way sweet adventures and crazy things to do this summer! Even if we don't find men, at least we will be having fun!