People often refer to older single's as 'leftovers.' Well, I am no leftover, nor do I deserve to settle for someone that is.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Distracted

For several reasons I have neglected to update in a little while. I’ve been busy, distracted, and trying to decide whether or not to stick around the internet! I think that for now I will just continue to update as I see fit because I really enjoy writing and…your company! I also enjoy the company of Mr. Keeper and have been taking in as much of it as possible over the last few weeks. I know, I know, I’m totally ignoring the rules. Okay, not completely…I’m trying to be somewhat more careful about how I play, “The Game.” By ignoring “the rules,” I mean that I’ve been a little too available. At first I was careful about it…somewhat. Lately however, I have been there for him at every request…or lack of request. Not good, right?! Thankfully he still seems happy in my company and quite ready to continue our shenanigans.


Before I go any further, I know you are dying for some details so I will share a little and then tell you what I’m thinking! Things are GREAT! I am SO happy! :) Mr. Keeper is a fun, fun guy. We are both ridiculously sarcastic so we get along well and have no trouble texting all day and night…or talking on the phone…or hanging out. He is a nice person too. He’s a good guy. So for now, we are having fun. He is really nice to me as well as respectful. We have hung out several times and usually end up staying together until all hours of the night or morning. He hasn’t kissed me but I’m kind of glad. It makes me feel like he really likes to be with me, and doesn’t just want to make out! :) Haha. He is a great cuddler though! He’s held my hand and given me some good squeezes so really, that whole drought thing is finally starting to be compensated for!

Despite all of the great things that happen, I am still a girl and being who I am, can find something to worry about in anything. In this situation I often find myself getting worried that any minute he is not going to like me, or that something bad will happen. I keep thinking of the words from my favorite book, “Their Eyes Were Watching God.” The following paragraph rings so true to me as I have often related in a similar manner. It reads:

"In the cool of the afternoon the fiend from hell specially sent to lovers arrived at Jaine's ear. Doubt. All the fears that circumstance could provide and the heart feel, attacked her on every side. This was a new sensation for her, but no less excruciating. If only Tea Cake would make her certain! He did not return that night nor the next and so she plunged into the abyss and descended to the ninth darkness where light has never been."

Wow, well said Ms. Hurston. Anyway, I like to doubt things but I am trying very hard not to let this show when I communicate with the man! I’m trying to keep it chill when I am with him, or not, and so far it seems to be working. Either way though, I’d really like to know where we are at. You know the dreaded, DTR (define the relationship), guess sometimes it’s necessary after all. Meanwhile, I’m just trying to enjoy life and not worry too terribly much because I know that whatever happens is meant to happen. I will let you know how things progress! For now however, I think I need to catch up on some lost sleep! Something has been keeping me up late!

2 comments:

Emilie said...

I'm glad you are so happy. And snuggling always helps! I loved the quote, that was amazing.

Livin it up said...

Thanks!! I love it too...it is so fitting for me! Things are still good though...we went on a real date last night, haha! I'll write about it later!