Let it Be

I know it's been a little while so I'm not sure if you are even still with me. Even now I should be in bed but I can't sleep so I finally decided to update! I need to share my recent thoughts. First of all, starting work again has been tough, on top of being called as Relief Society president in a new ward and keeping up with everything else I need to do. Basically, I am TIRED! I'm exhausted! I can't keep up with anything and it's getting me super down. I'm trying to stay up though. So, in an effort to stay on the up side....I really can't do this anymore. Well, I do mean to continue my blog, but I cannot worry about dating 40 guys right now. I stress about it way too much. I obsess over every little thing that might be wrong with me and frankly, I just want a man...a decent man that I could be interested in...to like me for who I am! I want a man to feel like I am worthy of chasing...that I am worth a little work. I am so, so tired of doing all the work! I have backed off a lot. Don't think I am giving up altogether though. If someone wants to ask me out (which would seriously be a miracle because I haven't really seen that happen in my entire 31 years) then I will not turn them away. If people want to set me up, then I will go. But I CANNOT seek them out and initiate anything in any way right now. I do not have the energy or time. I'm sorry if I am a disappointment to you because I really don't want to be, but I want to focus on my other goals off to the left there, and hopefully as I do, I will still become more datable and mostly just a better person. I want to focus on improving me for me. I do hope to get married and I will eventually date 40 men...probably just not this year. I can't anymore.

On that note, I will tell you a funny story and tell you that I do still have a couple of guys on the supposed "hook up" list so I will be updating about them. I will also try harder to post more often but you are gonna have to just hear about my life's adventure's minus dates for awhile cause I am not doing the asking! Okay, funny story. Today I went to church. Church was great! I enjoyed the lessons and talking with my friends. I wore a cute skirt that I recently picked up at Shade Clothing...one of my favs! Anyway, it's kinda short and full. When I went to church, the air was still. When I came out of church, it was so windy! I walked by three of my guy friends on the way to my car. One asked me where I was going and I asked him where I should go. That started a whole fun conversation with those boys. I enjoyed talking to them but really, I was fighting my skirt against the wind and it was a little awkward. As I was leaning over to keep the skirt down, I was also trying to keep my shirt up. Wow, I was really trying to avoid the peep show that I'm sure the boys got anyway. At one point, I may have been a little late in catching my skirt and I'm not sure if they saw anything, but judging from the huge smiles on their faces, it couldn't have been good! So I said, "ummm, I think I better leave now." They laughed and agreed and off I went. Darn that wind!! It was prob funny to watch me fighting with the clothes though...