Next in Line Please

Do you ever have those moments where you know you should do something, but then you don’t? For example, I have known for quite some time that I really should cut back my internet time. Honestly, I really have. Yesterday I was hardly home at all, so when I finally finished with work, conferences, private lessons, and meetings, I took a few minutes to check my facebook. I had a friend online that started talking to me pretty quickly so I talked back. Only seconds later this boy that I don’t even know started up a chat with me. He friended me some time back and I accepted only because I found out he is in my ward. As relief society president, I am trying to get to know everyone in the ward, so I decided this one time, not to turn him away (even though that is my normal policy with strangers).

This particular young man (oh my goodness, I don’t even know how old he is…yikes!!) is very much akin to Special #11. It could be his twin in fact. Except it’s not. But you get the idea, right? Something just isn’t exactly altogether there with him. For example, he started chatting with me on facebook like we were bestest friends. I cannot remember a single word spoken to this boy, ever! Even so, I tried to be nice and humor him. The president of our men’s group got online just then. He is a very good friend that I have not talked with much in weeks. So, I opened another chat box for him and immediately asked who this guy was. Let’s just pretend that his name is John White for just a minute. I can assure you that it isn’t, but let’s pretend. I ask said friend, “Who is John White?” Friend says, “Uh, he is uh John White.” I replied, “Wow, that really clears things up for me, thanks!”


After some friendly joking around I came to find out that the boy is indeed, or was, a member of the congregation that we attend. He and his brothers are in fact special ed in some way. They are VERY nice people. I’m just trying to describe to you who they are. Friend thought it was pretty hilarious that this John was chatting it up with me like we were old pals. He told me that they guy wanted to ask me out. I laughed it off of course, hoping it wasn’t true. But alas, it was true! Dang it friend, why did you have to be right this time? John said to me, “being single sucks.” I said, “oh really? I kinda like it.” I thought I was quite hilarious in this clever little reply. Friend thought it was funny too.


Friend decided that I should transcribe my conversation for him, so I did. It made the situation a little more entertaining for me, and slightly less painful as I realized once again that this seems to be my lot in life. Anyway, eventually this John White said, “just saying if I asked you out would you?” What else could I do but say, “sure.” I did just that and it was settled. Friend was elated, though he thought I was only humoring him at first when I told him of my acceptance. He told me that John was jumping up and down for joy. Then…then John confessed that he doesn’t drive, and memories of #11 came flooding back into my mind. I took a deep breath and assured him that it was no problem.

I’ve been through this before…I can handle it again. I’m hoping in this case that practice doesn’t make perfect however. I’m hoping that one day, maybe some magical day in a distance future that is hard to make out, there will be a real handsome man, a good man with a ridiculously amazing sense of humor and enthusiasm for life and living it, a hard working, loving man that will set his eyes on me and never want to divert them. He will want to pursue me until there is no more need of pursuit and beyond. I won’t have to do all the work because he will do his share and I will be happy…and so will he. Someday. Some magical, distant, far away day.

Check It

Hey there friends, readers, random passersby...guess what! Tomorrow you can check me out at another location in addition to this one. My friend asked me to guest post on her blog and I finally got up the courage to do it. Her blog is LE-GIT. There is a button on my left side bar or you can check it out here:

The posts on this blog vary daily but are all centered around us fabulous women and tips that make our lives easier, more fun, healthier, creative, and pretty much just amazing! It's for single's and marrieds alike. Several posts do give tips on parenting which I like to either pass on to my friends, or use on my cute nieces and nephews. So...no matter the post, you can be guaranteed enlightenment in some area or another. Hopefully such is the case tomorrow as well. Happy reading! I will post here soon about my most recent shenanigans.

I Love

Last week I held a relief society (the women’s organization in the LDS church) retreat at a cabin to the East of here in the mountains. It seemed to be a success with beautiful surroundings, lots of laughs, and more sugar than should ever be consumed in one sitting. The girls had fun…and so did I. Many of the girls I go to church with are quite a bit younger than me since technically, I am actually too old to be going to the young single adult wards anymore. Nonetheless, here I am. Most of the girls do not know my age, just that I am a little older than they…which brings me to my point. In church the day after our retreat, one of the girls that I spent a good deal of time with over the weekend, spoke about how much she loved our ward…how she was very hesitant to come to a single’s ward because of all the myths out there, but she was really grateful that our ward isn’t just students or a bunch of 30-40 year old single, lonely people. When she said that, it hit me pretty hard. I tried not to look shocked and finally was able just blow it off due to ignorance.


I’ve thought about this comment on several occasions this week and finally come to the conclusion that I am grateful for what she said. If she doesn’t think that I am old and lonely and crazy and boring, then I am a success! All that matters is that I am living life, enjoying it, and not falling into that category or those misconceptions about people my age. I think it is fantastic that she hung out with me all weekend and doesn’t know that I am over 30 or even lonely sometimes. Because I am. At the same time, I’m having fun and being me.

Today I was pondering life and it just hit me that I am actually REALLY grateful to be single right now. This has pretty much never happened to me but I could honestly say that I am grateful. I LOVE this time of year because it really causes reflection of the important things in life and how blessed we are. All of the things that I am grateful for came rushing to my mind. One of those is my singledom. I have a fantastic family and because I am single, I have more time to spend with them…especially my cute nieces and nephews. Some of those cuties are moving back to town in a couple of weeks and I cannot wait! I have so many plans…I hope they don’t get sick of me!

Many other benefits of my single status greet me each day. I can go wherever I want and do what I please whenever I want. I can live my life on my own whim and I kinda like it. I like being spontaneous. I like putting together cute packages for my friend on her mission and spending way too much money on them…not having to really answer to anyone but myself. I like being successful at my own life…all by myself. There are many benefits and I am grateful. So, instead of focusing on what I don’t have…I am going to focus on what I DO have. Then, I can make the most out of now and when the time comes for me to move on, I will eagerly do so. But for now…

A Book

The last couple of weeks have really held nothing worth writing about. Sad I Know. I should have updated you on my personal progress at least. On that note…I am almost through the third book in the Old Testament. Progress is progress right? I also just started a health competition with my relief society and I feel better already. I know those last 15 pounds will finally start to shed themselves. They really are the hardest. They hate me! Or they love me I guess because they don’t want to be rid of me! I still play in a local community symphony orchestra which is great practice for me. Right now I don’t have time to practice enough to audition for the one I want to be in so for now, this will do. We had a great concert last Sunday night and it was really enjoyable just to make some music. I love playing the violin! And…as far as the men thing goes, well…you know where I’m at there. I really just don’t care right now, sorry! There are too many other things to worry about.


About those other things, they are stressful. At church the other day, one of the speakers talked about having a balance in your life. I kept that in mind yesterday as I let myself pull into the library parking lot. I love the library…and book stores…and any place with good reading material! I’ve been wanting to go there for some time but have avoided books because I felt like I had sooo many other things that needed my attention. Lately however, I have really wanted to learn Spanish. Since I can’t afford to take a class just yet, I thought I’d see what fun CD’s the library had to offer on the subject. I drive around a lot for work and I figured that it would be a useful way to spend my travel time. While I was already in the building, I couldn’t just not look at the books. I let myself take a peek to see if a certain book was available. It wasn’t. But…there were two others that caught my attention with their pretty covers and I couldn’t just leave them sitting there on the shelf. So, they came home with me.

Last night, after finishing a whole list of things I needed to do, I let myself read. Almost from the start, I was a little disappointed. This really makes that saying true, “you can’t judge a book by its cover.” Of course, I almost always judge a book by its cover. If I like the way it looks, I get it! Haha. That’s only when I want mindless entertainment though. I save the heavier, more meaningful reading for Summer time, when I have less to think about. Anyway, right now calls for light reading of meaningless fiction. Okay, back to my disappointment.

First of all, I know it’s meaningless reading, but I’m still unimpressed with the writing. I know it shouldn’t matter, and I’m not a great writer, but some writing styles just bug me. So I’m a bit of a book snob, oh well…what can ya do? Anyway, not a big deal. The part I’m really bugged about is that all of these books are about 18-22 year olds. They are always about them getting married…or getting too old so they need to get married. I realize that the greater part of our population (it was an LDS book) gets married at that age. The thing I don’t like is when other characters in the book give the main character a hard time about not being married, or dating, etc. They make it sound like you have the plague if you aren’t married by like 24. Some of them keep saying things like, “you know what they say about people who reach a certain age and aren’t married….” Ugh!! That’s slightly offensive to those of us who reach that age. At least I think it is. I don’t think I have done anything to deserve such criticism. I’ve tried to be successful with my life and I think I’m a fairly normal person…it just hasn’t been my time yet! It’s okay that some of us have a different plan in life and God has other things in store for us.

So, on that note, I’m really thinking that I should write a book. I don’t know if I can though. I don’t feel like I am the best writer in town but seriously, one about this whole transition from young single adult to single adult might be good. I don’t know. Anyway, just thought I’d throw that out there…but then, who has time to write a book anyway? It would just be nice to have some reading material that involved normal, never-been-married, single people with successful lives.

Before I let you go read something more interesting, do you want to know what some of my favorite books are? My favorite, favorite is “Their Eyes Were Watching God.” Such a fantastic story with an amazing message! The writing style is beyond fabulous and mostly, I just love it!

I’m also a fan of, “The Book Thief.” I really like the way this was written as well. It is narrated by Death. What an interesting twist, right? I think authors that think outside the box a little and create something unique.

Last but not least, I love “The Giver.” It is a super easy read with a very interesting story line and a good message. Love it!

Of course there are many others, these are just a few of my top favs of what constitutes a good book. Love, The book snob.

Mr. Refreshing #12

It wasn’t the fact that the air was cold, crisp, and clean, or that his breath didn’t smell that made tonight’s date refreshing. No, it was the fact that it wasn’t the same date that I had the last two weeks, as well as almost every other date all year. Nope, it was a little different. More thought and less boring conversation really made the night a success.

So, here’s how it went down. As usual, toward the afternoon part of the day I started to feel that awful sense of dread. I began to wonder why my friend set me up with this guy. Why did I wonder? Well, she is my age and single too…so why doesn’t she date him? You always have to wonder that when a fellow single traveler on the ship of life sets you up right? I tried to force all negative thoughts out of my head and went for a quick run between work and the date…just to build up some happy endorphins and let out a little nerves/dread. Running always makes you feel better, right? Yet worse at the same time…it’s funny that way.

Well, Mr. Refreshing picked me up right on time and we headed downtown. It was really nice that he picked me up and wasn’t on a bike because it was snowing. It would have been a cold trip downtown. Anyway, on the way out we mostly talked about me and I felt bad because we were talking about me. At the same time, it was so nice that I didn’t feel like I had to carry the conversation…it just flowed easily, mostly thanks to him. We got out most of the usual things on the way there and then put it behind us to have a little more fun. Really, I want to know the guy but I just don’t want to have that conversation again, ya know??

So, we ended up at the church history museum. This is always a cool place, and while it was cool tonight…it was also warm which is a bonus on a snowy evening. I always enjoy seeing all the old stuff from way back in the day and learning a little more about church history. This guy seems well read on the subject and I learned a thing or two. When it comes to history, I’m a little bit of a slacker and I can never remember details so I had nothing interesting to contribute sadly. On the way there and in the museum, it became apparent that the man had a sense of humor…thank goodness! It was nice to laugh, I needed that.

So, after the museum, we grabbed some hot chocolate to go, and walked over to temple square. It started to snow on us just as we did. We stood under the tabernacle and watched the snow fall down over the temple…it was really pretty! As we did so, we played that game where you make up stories about the people walking by. I was a little shy at first and ummm, not very good at that game, but it was fun to try. For some reason, my stories all came out slightly disturbing and now he thinks I’m emo (even though I had to tell him what that was)and blind, due to my inability to tell male from female, but that’s okay. ? He suggested that in my future optometry appointments, I add the gender deciphering feature to my glass. Well, that and he gave me a lesson on how to tell the difference based mostly on their clothing, which isn’t always the best indicator!

So, either these tipped him off to my trench coat past, or the story about my near death experience at a buffet and my fear of dying at such a place…how embarrassing would that be?? Okay, didn’t really happen but it made a good story anyway, right?

So, it was fun to laugh and talk about other things and make up stupid things…like I used to do with someone else. But I didn’t think of him then (someone else) because it wasn’t worth it or necessary. Mr. Refreshing seems like a good guy; very nice, gentlemanly, funny, and easy to be around. Thanks friend for setting me up!

Ps…#10 called me while I was out. My phone was off so he left a voicemail. I guess I’ll just see if he calls back again because I don’t feel like putting out the effort to call him back. He was boring and didn’t make up funny stories or do something outside of my regular box….despite being a very nice, good guy.

Tuesday is a Special Day

This is going to be a quick post because I really need to go to bed. I just wanted to update all my fabulous readers. I have another date coming this Tuesday. Wow, can you believe that? That's 3 Tuesday's in a row...right after I quite this whole thing. I'm pretty excited for this one though. My friend set me up and he sounded on the phone like a nice normal guy and one with a plan. I like him already, just because he had our date all planned out and it's not dinner! Refreshing! So, we will see how it goes.

I also want to say that I feel so, so blessed today. I know that there is a God. I know that He is my Heavenly Father and is sooo mindful of who I am and EXACTLY what I need, whether it be something silly or not. He blesses me and I know that He blesses all of you, whether you take time to recognize it or not. His blessings are abundant and so much more perfect and thorough than I would ever have been able to imagine up in my mind. I love Him and am grateful for the knowledge of His presence in my life!!

ps...guess who I hung out with tonight? Lot's of guys...and girls...including, Mr. Hopeful. Remember him? He will never want to date me but I still had a lot of fun with him and his roommate. Fun and funny guys. Plus, as I mentioned before, he is really good looking! Well, until Tuesday then. Or maybe Wednesday.

Special #11

I promised a good story when it came to #11. The thing is, I was kind of being judgmental and rude. Let me tell you why though. There is a lady that I work with all day every day. She is pretty much the only adult that I see consistently every day. Lucky me. Okay, there I go again…sorry. Anyway, she is pretty nice and definitely has good intentions, even though they are not always apparent. So, there is this guy that she goes to church with. She secretly has a crush on him but is 35 years older than him. Since he is off the market for her, she felt that she should set him up. Her first choice was another girl who is much cooler than me but doesn’t work with us every day. We only have the privilege of her company about once a month. Since I was the next available single female within reach, she decided to do me the honors instead.


After committing me to go out with said co-worker’s eye candy, she proceeds to describe him to me in this fashion. She says, “He is a little bit socially awkward. I think he is just really shy. He rides his bike everywhere because he went to get his driver’s license once and the lady yelled at him so he has never tried again. He lives at home with his parents, didn’t go on a mission but he is a really good guy!” So, that was my first impression of him. Well, that and that fact that he shares his name with my grandma…a deal breaker in itself! Seriously though, what was I supposed to think of this guy? Immediately I began to regret committing to give just anyone a chance at least once.

Since the guy was supposedly socially awkward, I had high hopes that maybe he wouldn’t call. When asked if he had a few days later, I reported to my co-worker that he had not. She began to imitate a conversation between him and their bishop and herself. When she imitated him saying, “I’m gonna call…” in a very whiny sort of voice, sounding perfectly like someone who is a little bit slow, I began to be a bit suspicious. When he did call me and in the same voice really quickly, and without pause said, “Hi this is #11, co-workers friend, she said you would go out with me?!” I definitely knew that things were not altogether right. She may not know it but I think that he is a little more than just socially awkward.

Mentally handicap or not, he was very friendly on the phone but seemed like he wanted me to call the shots. I told him I would get back to him at the beginning of the next week when I was less busy. We set the date for Tuesday though. That’s when I asked him if I could ride on his handle bars and he said, “well, I don’t know how good I am but I have a rack on the back you can ride on.” Haha…sweet! What a gentleman!

Sunday rolled around and he called to confirm our date and this time he had a plan. He was told by his buddies that we should go to the Spaghetti Factory. Mmmm, I’m a fan so I agreed. Plus, it’s close enough to my house that I knew I wouldn’t have to go too out of my way. We planned to meet there at 6:30. Tuesday came along and by the time 6:30 finally arrived, I was starving!! On Sunday I told him that I would call him when I got there and he said, “or I will just call you when I get there.” So, I figured I would just let him call since he would be riding his bike and all.

I got there close to on time and waited until 6:35 before I finally called him out of sheer hunger and near starvation!! As it turned out, he had been sitting out front the whole time. He said he arrived quite early, having really over estimated the bike time. It only took him 40 minutes. At that point I felt pretty bad for not picking him up. I didn’t think about offering until after we hung up on Sunday. What a horrible person! He seemed completely okay with it though, as if it is the most normal thing in the world. It is good exercise I guess.

Okay, when I first saw him I must say I was pleasantly surprised. He really wasn’t bad looking. He was better looking than #10. He had cute dimples anyway. Still, when he spoke, it seemed overly loud and definitely somewhat abnormal. I decided to do my best to be a good date for him. Upon further communications previously with my co-worker, I found out that he doesn’t talk to girls or date much. After the date she said that it was probably his first date so she hoped that I showed him how it was done. Great. Anyway, we got a table in the back corner which was good for my prideful self.

Our conversation mostly centered around him. Good. I just tried to keep him talking which really wasn’t hard at all. He likes to talk. I think that the highlight of our conversation was really a toss-up between him converting fractions to decimals for me, and him telling me on and on about how his co-worker keeps trying to get him to go to the nudie bar across the street from where he works. He told me all about what such a place would be like. Awwwwkkkkwarrrrd! I tried not to notice however and to steer the convo elsewhere.

All in all, he really is a good guy, which is why in the end, I can’t really make fun of him or be demeaning in any way. He works 12 hours a day and then helps neighbors with things they need fixing. In the winter he shovels about 10 driveways and 25 sidewalks a day…before his 12 hour work shift. When his family is out of town he remodels one of their rooms for them. He is the elder’s quorum president in his ward and seems like he really takes that seriously. He was named after their neighbor who died while snow blowing his driveway. My date inherited his name and the snow blower. Now, every time he uses it he thinks of that man. It’s kind of a creepy story but I felt a little sad for him when he was telling it to me. He said the guy was like a grandpa to him. Anyway, it was at that point that I realized I really couldn’t say anything bad about him. He is a very nice, very good guy…I am not. First of all, I am a girl. Secondly, I just don’t think I am good enough to accept him in a relationship kind of way.

As we left the restaurant, we were getting ready to part ways; me to my car, he to his bike, when he pulled out his old school walkman/tape recorder and got all set to continue his book on tape for the long journey home. I like listening to books on CD as well…only in my car. He seemed happy to be biking back home in the dark but still, I felt bad once again. I hope he made it okay. I wish him the best…bicycle and all.